Every Tuesday, an expert from The Ethics Centre offers advice on ethical issues impacting public servants. This week’s question:
“I’m a senior manager (female) who has just started a relationship with a colleague (also female). Neither of us is attached but I’m worried if we reveal our relationship, the rest of the office will be very judgmental … especially as I’m two or three pay levels above my new love. What should I do?”
Today’s answer comes from Dr Tim Dean, senior philosopher at The Ethics Centre:
Love is often as unexpected as it is disruptive, which is why workplace relationships are both not uncommon and also require a delicate touch to ensure they do not compromise our professional integrity.
The specific wording of your case reveals what appear to be two dimensions of ethical concern. The first is that revealing your relationship with a colleague could draw negative judgement from your co-workers, especially if they disapprove of same-sex relationships. The second is that they might perceive there to be a conflict of interest, given that your responsibilities as a senior manager might sit in tension with your responsibilities to your partner. Let’s start by unpacking the latter issue before returning to the former.
As a member of the Australian Public Service, you are bound both legally and ethically to behave impartially for the common good of the Australian public. This means avoiding conflicts of interest, which is where a personal interest might influence your decisions or actions while executing your official duties. Given that many people believe that our loyalty to loved ones ought to trump our loyalty to other organisations, should you (or your partner) ever be placed in situation where you have to choose between the interests of your organisation or your partner, this could result in the relationship influencing your official duties.
This is complicated by the fact that the conflict of interest need not be real. Even if you were certain that your relationship would not affect your behaviour in the workplace, just the existence of a perceived or potential conflict of interest is sufficient to raise concerns. This is exacerbated by the power imbalance between you and your partner, given your respective pay levels.
The prospect of a real or perceived conflict of interest is one reason why secrecy around your relationship is not an option. By keeping it secret, you fail to respect your colleagues’ and the public’s right to have confidence that your decisions are not influenced by a conflict of interest. And should others discover the secret, it would only raise greater suspicions about other possible conflicts of interest. This is why transparency is essential to ensuring ethical integrity.
The ideal solution is to not place yourself, or your partner, in a situation where a conflict of interest — real or apparent — compounded by a power imbalance can exist. This might mean one or both of you choosing to change role, such that there cannot be a clash of interests when it comes to executing your duties. But this solution comes at a cost, especially as you may both value your current roles highly. It also raises another ethical dilemma: who ought to change role, and bear the cost that entails? However, it might turn out that this cost is lower than the burden of dealing with potential conflicts of interest should you continue to work in the same organisation.
The second dimension of your question speaks to the sensitivity around behaving in ways that don’t affect your professional decision but might still draw the disapproval of others. There may be no way to avoid the possibility of disapproval, at least while we live in a multicultural country that allows for a diverse range of beliefs. However, the same institutions that allow for that diversity of beliefs also enshrines tolerance and non-discrimination. In this case, the public service code of conduct provides some defence against negative discrimination from others, as it requires all public service employees to treat everyone with respect and courtesy, and without harassment. That doesn’t mean you won’t be judged, nor that some of that judgement may be unjust, but it does offer you and your partner a measure of protection in the workplace.
Like many ethical issues, even when there are clear courses of action that fulfil your ethical obligations, there are often costs to be borne in doing so. However, the virtues of love can make those costs well worth bearing.
If you have an ethical question for one of The Ethics Centre’s team of experts, send it to media@themandarin.com.au.
The Ethics Centre is an independent not-for-profit that advocates for a more ethical society. If you’re struggling to find the path forward on an ethical conflict at work or at home, there is a service that can help. Ethi-call, run by The Ethics Centre, is a free helpline dedicated to guiding people through life’s hardest choices.
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